When the Holy Cross fifth-grade dodgeball team voted to name themselves the Hamsters three years ago, the decision was met with skepticism. Hamsters, several parents noted at the time, are small, somewhat timid, and not traditionally associated with athletic dominance. The team’s faculty advisor, Coach Deborah Williams, said she had encouraged them to reconsider. ‘I suggested the Eagles. I suggested the Falcons. They wanted Hamsters.’ She paused. ‘I’ve come to accept it.’
This acceptance became considerably easier last Friday, when the Hamsters — officially, the Holy Cross Elementary School Dodgeball Hamsters — defeated four rival schools in back-to-back-to-back-to-back tournament rounds to claim the Greater Lincoln Elementary Athletic Association Dodgeball Championship trophy for the second consecutive year, cementing what sports analysts are beginning to describe, with some bemusement, as a dynasty.
The championship game, held at Lincoln’s Pershing Center gymnasium, was attended by approximately 200 family members, students, and faculty. The Hamsters faced the Jefferson Elementary Thunderbolts in the final round — a team that had won the championship three years running before the Hamsters’ unexpected rise to power — and defeated them in four minutes and eleven seconds, which Coach Williams confirmed is a tournament record.
The offensive anchor of the team is Jaylen Johnson, a fifth grader who, according to tournament officials and a radar gun borrowed from a local police department’s community outreach program, is capable of throwing a dodgeball at exactly 47 miles per hour. This is, for context, approximately three times the speed most adults throw a dodgeball, and has caused at least two opposing coaches to quietly request that tournament rules be reviewed regarding age verification. Both requests were denied. Jaylen is ten.
The team’s strategy, Williams explained, extends beyond Jaylen’s throwing arm. ‘We practice footwork every Tuesday. We practice catching every Thursday. And on Fridays we do what I call ‘chaos drills,’ where I roll twelve balls onto the court at once and they have to react.’ She attributes the team’s calm under pressure to these drills. ‘They don’t panic. Hamsters are actually quite calm animals when they know what they’re doing.’ It is unclear whether she has spent time with hamsters recently.
Following the victory, the trophy — a three-foot-tall golden dodgeball on a marble base, which is significantly larger than anyone expected — was transported to Holy Cross in the back of Principal Hawkins’ minivan. It now occupies the main display case in the school lobby, next to the academic bowl trophy from 2019 and the spelling bee certificate from last year. Several students have noted that it is larger than both of those combined. Several students have also noted that the main display case now needs to be expanded, which the principal has acknowledged is a fair point.
The Hamsters begin practice for the spring invitational tournament in three weeks. Go Hamsters.