ST. PAUL'S STUDENT ACCIDENTALLY DISCOVERS NEW ELEMENT, WINS SCIENCE FAIR

What was supposed to be a routine volcano model ended in scientific history Thursday afternoon, when seventh-grader Marcus Delgado accidentally synthesized an entirely new chemical element during St. Paul’s Middle School’s 34th Annual Science Fair — and still only placed second.

Delgado, 12, said he was attempting to recreate the classic baking soda and vinegar eruption when he “accidentally grabbed the wrong bottle” from his older sister’s chemistry set.

“It made a really cool green foam,” Delgado said, shrugging. “And then the foam started glowing. And then it ate through the cafeteria table a little bit.”

Scientists from the nearby University of Nebraska arrived on scene within hours and confirmed that Delgado had produced an element with an atomic number of 119, which does not currently exist on the periodic table. They have tentatively named it Marcusium pending a formal peer review, though Delgado himself has requested it be called Foamium.

“This is an extraordinary, once-in-a-generation discovery,” said Dr. Patricia Holt, a nuclear physicist who examined the sample while wearing three pairs of safety goggles. “The child made it with white vinegar and something called ‘Crazy Foam Party Mix.’ I don’t know how to explain this.”

Despite the historic achievement, Delgado was edged out for first place by fellow seventh-grader Brianna Kowalczyk, whose project, “Does Music Help Plants Grow?”, was awarded the blue ribbon by science teacher Mr. Fernandez.

“Brianna’s presentation board was very neat,” Mr. Fernandez explained at a press conference held in the gymnasium. “She used three different fonts and had a really nice bar graph. Marcus’s table had a small crater in it.”

Kowalczyk, for her part, was gracious in victory. “I played classical music for a fern for six weeks,” she said proudly, holding her ribbon. “It grew about two inches. I think Mozart helped.”

The fern was not available for comment.

Other notable entries at this year’s fair included eighth-grader Devon Simms’s project on aerodynamics, which successfully launched a paper airplane through the gymnasium skylight, and sixth-grader Lily Park’s investigation into whether her dog could tell the difference between peanut butter brands — a project that was ultimately disqualified after the dog ate two of the judges’ lunches.

Principal Sandra Okafor praised the event as a tremendous success, noting that the school’s insurance policy had “fortunately been renewed in February.”

Delgado said he is not discouraged by his second-place finish and plans to continue his research at home, provided his parents allow him to use the garage.

“I think if I add a little more of the Crazy Foam stuff, I can maybe get to element 120,” he said thoughtfully. “Or I’ll make a volcano again. Either way.”

The St. Paul’s Science Fair will return next spring. The cafeteria table has been replaced.