Owen May liked to think of himself as a man on the rise. A visionary. A hustler. A road‑runner. A go‑getter. A jack of all trades. An entrepreneur. He used all these titles interchangeably, depending on who he was talking to and how dramatic he felt that day.
The truth, however, was far less glamorous: Owen was jobless.
Not “between opportunities.” Not “self‑employed.” Not “building his brand.” Just… jobless. But he refused to let something as trivial as reality get in the way of his personal mythology.
At eighteen, he considered himself a risk‑taker. The problem was that the biggest risk he took on a weekly basis was ignoring the expiration dates on leftovers. But in Owen’s mind, that counted as living dangerously.
His best friend, Zach Mueller, wasn’t much different. Zach liked to call himself a “blue‑collar worker,” which sounded rugged and noble—like he spent his days welding steel beams or repairing heavy machinery. In reality, Zach pushed carts at the local grocery store. And not even the big carts. The small ones. The ones that squeaked like they were begging for retirement.
Still, Zach wore his reflective vest with pride, as if it were a uniform of honor.
Together, they were unstoppable—mostly because no one was trying to stop them.
The Big Idea That Wasn’t
One humid afternoon, Owen burst into Zach’s garage, which served as their unofficial headquarters for brainstorming, scheming, and avoiding responsibilities.
“Zach, I’ve got it,” Owen announced, pacing with the intensity of someone who had just discovered fire. “Our big break.”
Zach looked up from polishing his cart‑pushing gloves. “Is this like the time you tried to start a dog‑walking business but forgot you were allergic to dogs?”
“That was a learning experience,” Owen said. “This is different. We’re starting a company.”
“What kind of company?”
Owen paused. He hadn’t thought that far ahead.
“A… general company,” he said confidently. “We’ll do everything. That’s why I’m a jack of all trades.”
Zach nodded slowly, as if trying to keep up with a train that had already derailed. “So what’s the first trade?”
Owen shrugged. “We’ll figure it out.”
The First Job (And Immediate Failure)
Their first opportunity came from Mrs. Henderson, the elderly woman down the street who needed help moving a bookshelf. Owen saw it as the perfect chance to prove their entrepreneurial prowess.
“See?” he whispered to Zach as they approached her porch. “This is how empires start.”
The bookshelf, however, was heavier than either of them expected. Owen grabbed one end, Zach grabbed the other, and Mrs. Henderson supervised with the optimism of someone who had clearly never seen these two attempt manual labor.
“Lift with your legs,” she advised.
Owen nodded, then immediately lifted with his back. The bookshelf wobbled. Zach tried to compensate, but physics had other plans. The shelf tipped, teetered, and came crashing down—directly onto Owen’s foot.
He screamed. Mrs. Henderson screamed. Zach apologized to the bookshelf.
After limping home, Owen declared, “Manual labor is beneath our skill set.”
Zach agreed. “We’re more… idea guys.”
Rebranding the Dream
The next week, Owen updated his social media bio to reflect his new direction:
Owen May — Visionary. Innovator. Self‑Made Entrepreneur.
Zach updated his:
Zach Mueller — Blue Collar Professional (Cart Division).
Neither had a job, but both had titles, and in their minds, that was close enough.
They spent the next several days brainstorming new business ideas, all of which were terrible. A subscription service for motivational quotes Owen wrote himself. A mobile app that did nothing but display a picture of Zach giving a thumbs‑up. A delivery service that didn’t actually deliver anything but promised “emotional support through logistics.”
Every idea died within minutes.
But they kept trying, because trying was free.
A Future Full of Possibilities (Mostly Imaginary)
One evening, as they sat on the curb outside the grocery store—Zach still in his reflective vest, Owen still limping slightly—they watched the sunset paint the sky orange.
“You ever think we’re meant for something big?” Owen asked.
“All the time,” Zach said.
They sat in silence for a moment.
“We just haven’t figured out what it is yet,” Owen added.
Zach nodded. “But we will.”
And maybe—just maybe—they would.
But not today.
Today, they were busy planning their next big idea.
Which, as usual, they hadn’t thought of yet.
